Life can sometimes be work, work, work. |
Fun doesn’t seem to feature in my life much. I don’t really have time/money.
And I’m not sure this is a good thing.
I think having fun is important, I just find it hard. When I use time on something meaningless,
such as Football Manager, I consider it time wasted and feel guilty: I should
have been writing.
The truth is, I’ve never really known what I enjoy. My mother used to ask me: ‘Is there anything
you do like?!’ after I had declared I
didn’t like yet another activity: playing football, swimming, and youth groups,
to name but a few.
Of course, there are things I do in my spare time: reading,
playing music, or watching films, for example.
But I question whether I actually ‘enjoy’ them: are they fun? Or do I do them to pass the time while I’m on
the tram, or eating, or too tired lazy to write?
As I’ve grown older, I’ve learned what I want to do:
writing. And I’ve found I can write and
perform songs as a side-line. But I don’t
do them for fun. In fact, when I sit
down to write, it feels like far harder work than the time I sit at my desk
9-5.
And having sat at said desk all day/week, which is itself particularly unenjoyable, it’s then difficult to do the hard writing, even though I ‘want’ to do it.
In fact, it leads to great frustration: knowing I could do
my writing, if only I didn’t first have to tire myself out in a day job in
order to pay the bills etc.
Apologies. I don’t
mean to whine.
I think we all need time for relaxation, and fun. If you’re like me, I recommend trying to
allow yourself to have fun from time to time.
And maybe I’ll make it a belated New Year’s Resolution.
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